Comments on: Difficulties in intercultural communication: What not to do

By: Matti

Matti — Sat, 20 Oct 2007 14:13:55 +0000

I suppose that intercultural dialogue indeed often fails because of malicious generalizations — but also because of people comparing incomparable things. Perhaps originating from Hall/Bauman-ish us/them dichotomy, we have this tendency to compare, e.g., our ideals with others’ practice; our norms with others’ dogmas; etc.

When we see killing in Rwanda, we tend to note, “but our religion/culture/etc forbids killing”. When we hear that Talibani destroys ages-old statues, we condemn them saying, “people must respect their history.”

There we contrast our ideals with others’ practice; others’ dogmas with our norms. But you can’t do that, in all fairness’ name. If you must compare us and them, compare dogmas with dogmas, actions with actions, norms with norms, and ideals with ideals.

By: Clint

Clint — Sat, 20 Oct 2007 14:32:42 +0000

Very interesting comment Matti. I had to read your comment twice before I think I understand what you meant, and I like what you are saying. I’m trying to think of a practical example of doing what you suggest, but to be honest it is difficult to easily come up with one.
Perhaps it is because we see only the actions of others (tangible things) and it is difficult to visualize or understand the intangibles (ideals, etc). In a cultural context, even our own ideals are often hard to recognize and articulate, much less to really understand those of others.
And I can’t help but wonder about there being at least some deeper universal ideals that perhaps all humans share - with simply different applications of them? (e.g. in every world religion there is the equivalent of the golden rule - not to do to someone else what you would not want done to yourself)
Then that brings up the discrepancy between even a persons or societies own ideals vs. their own actions.
Wow - I guess you have given me a lot to think about. Thanks.

By: Becky

Becky — Thu, 25 Oct 2007 23:01:12 +0000

Do you feel that there IS an answer to all of these conflicts? Or is it possible that there isn’t anything we can do about some of them?

When I went to Israel a few months ago–I saw hundreds of kids carrying guns, I saw how much anger there is about the Temple Mount, I had guys with guns search through our bus at the Bethlehem Wall as we arrived and left, I saw things each side of the government had done to make the other mad, etc., and it hit me that there might NOT be a prospect or hope for peace in that land. Almost all the people I talked with could be considered ‘normal people’ who want to be friends and share the land with each other, but there are too many who don’t and, like you said, make generalizations and refuse to see their own faults. They refuse to soften their hearts and cause so many problems. (Have you ever read “Blood Brothers”? It’s incredible. Put it on your list right now, if not!) Anyway, as I was up on the Temple Mount I had an overwhelming feeling that there was no hope for peace in that land until the Savior comes and reigns. There is just too much bitterness and misunderstanding that too many refuse to try to overcome.

Am I pessimistic? Do I not know enough?

By: Clint

Clint — Fri, 26 Oct 2007 08:30:00 +0000

Since you are recommending books - I’ll add one that I think you would like. It is called “The Anatomy of Peace” - by the Arbinger group (related to the very topic you mention). They show how the wars in the world are larger reflections of the wars in our own homes and hearts. Reading it helped convince me some more that peace is possible, but has to begin in ourselves.

I also think of my friend from Rwanda, who I met in Tanzania. His father and brother were killed in the senseless ethnic slaughter. I asked him if he was bitter and angry. He sincerely said, “No, what good would that do? That does not help to heal anyone or our country. We just need to be more optimistic and move forward.”

Is that hopelessly naive or powerfully wise?

Easier said than done obviously, but I think he is an example of someone who is doing it. It seemed to me like a Gandhi approach.